I hope all 3 of my readers are enjoying their respective summers. In the absence of hockey, I've been having a lot of random thoughts. For instance,
Who is Paul Revere?,
am I actually supposed to be a whale?, and who the
Falk named the Connecticut Whale? I mean, I get it, Hartford used to have the Whalers so it made perfect sense for the Wolfpack to rename the organization this past year. But seriously? Just one whale? You’re not going to go with the classic name that Hartfordians came to love? What exactly are the fans supposed to chant – “let’s go wha-ale clap-clap, clap-clap-clap” where the
fans awkwardly force a word that has anything other than two syllables in it? Go-Whale-Go?
Not only did the Hartford management screw up the team name, they gave it an equally lame logo. How does that cute little guy manage to hold the stick with his flippers? He’s probably scowling at the fact that he represents a team whose fans don’t give one
Brashear about the Rangers, and are instead hoping for the revival of their beloved Whalers. Talk about an identity crisis.
But hey, I can’t hate on Hartford’s decision to change the name/logo. It’s not
that awful. With a little inspiration from the guys over at
Bush Party I’ve compiled a list of teams whose logos/names
are that awful.
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Hartford Wolfpack (AHL) - 1998
Apparently the organization has a history of bad logos. I think it's time for the EPA to step in and investigate what exactly is in the Long Island Sound...
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This is why Connecticut can't have nice things... Were the slash marks across the "S" really necessary? Did they really need to call themselves the
Beast of New Haven instead of, I dunno, maybe putting the city name
in front of their team name, like every other sports team that has ever existed? Did the organization actually think semi-professional hockey could last in New Haven? No. No. Yes, but they were clearly on something, as evidenced in their logo selection.
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Boston Bruins (NHL) 1977-1995
Thank God somebody was smart enough to put a trademark on this one, otherwise it might have been stolen.
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Binghamton Broome Dusters (AHL) 1977-1980
The most unfortunately ironic name for a team since the Buffalo Benders or the Hamilton Hosers.
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Cleveland Barons (AHL) 1937-1972
Ha! It looks like a ... Matt Cooke? The top hat and monocle are a nice touch. You stay classy, Matt Cooke.
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Buffalo Bisons (AHL) 1956-1970
It's certainly ***
refreshing*** to see a team from Buffalo not go with the stereotyped logo of using a Bison or Buffalo as their logo. See what I did there?
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Calgary Centennials (WHL) 1968-1977
The strongest team financially that the Western Hockey League has ever seen.
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Syracuse Crunch (AHL) 1996-1999
Mintberry Crunch!
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Syracuse Crunch (AHL) 1999 - ...
Well, at least they got it right their second try. Nothing says Crunch quite like a rabid, white gorilla with fists for ears.
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Saskatoon Blades (WHL) 2000-2005
Another classic identity crisis. Team mistakes an angry, animated Tonka truck for a "blade". Common misconception.
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Drummondville Voltigeurs (QMJHL) 1994-2005
I was surprised to see that "voltigeur" does not translate directly to: mailman carrying a hockey stick capable of flatulating pucks. Although in hindsight, that would have been an oddly specific definition.
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Kelowna Rockets (WHL) 2000 - ...
Rocket: - noun. 1.)
any of various simple or complex tubelike devices containing combustibles that on being ignited liberate gases whose action propels the tube
through the air: used for pyrotechnic effect, signaling, carrying a lifeline, hurling explosives at an enemy, putting a space
vehicle into orbit, etc.
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PEI Rocket (QMJHL) 2003 - ...
Rocket: - noun. 1.) any of various simple or complex tubelike devices containing combustibles that on being ignited liberate gases whose action propels the tube through the air: used for pyrotechnic effect, signaling, carrying a lifeline, hurling explosives at an enemy, putting a space vehicle into orbit, etc.
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Springfield Indians (AHL) 1954-1967
Central scouting had this guy in the top 10 North-American prospect list for the ability to keep his head up with the puck and his great vision.
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New York Islanders (league unknown) 1995-1997
The legendary fishsticks logo. I want to personally thank the artist behind this masterpiece for giving us Rangers fans something to smile about in the years where we miss the playoffs. I'm not sure why the mascot looks so angry though... the Islanders are afterall the best minor-league hockey team in New York.
